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Everything posted by Joh

  1. Adesanya vs Whittaker announced as the main event of UFC 243, great to hear, really excited for it. I hope the event is held in Australia like the rumours are saying.
  2. Joh

    MMAnalysis w/ Joh

    UFC Fight Night 155 - Post Show Analysis Ryan Hall def. Darren Elkins - Unanimous Decision Although I didn't predict an outcome for this fight as it was in the middle of the prelims, this was one of the fights I was looking forward to most heading into the show. Ryan Hall is an extremely entertaining grappler and Darren Elkins is probably made of steel. I really enjoyed this fight. Hall's style is probably one of the most unique styles in the UFC, with an exciting kicking game mixed in with his ever-present Imanari Rolls, which he uses to try and take down his opponent and attempt a Heel Hook. Hall attempted MANY spinning wheel kicks in this fight and one of those wheel kicks in the first round hit Elkins clean on the chin. Elkins gets dropped but the referee allows Elkins time to recover as Elkins tries to defend Hall's following onslaught. Hall immediately locks in a tight Guillotine but somehow, some way, Elkins escapes and continues fighting. As I said before, Elkins is as tough as nails. An easy win for Hall in round 1, who also definitely won round 2. I think round 3 is tougher to call since Hall spent most of it trying to avoid Elkins' offense which probably didn't impress the judges. In the end, Hall won with the judges scoring the contest 29-28, 29-28 and 30-27. Very fun fight, I'm excited to see more of Hall. Marvin Vettori def. Cezar Ferreira - Unanimous Decision Oh boy, already 1 wrong decision for the main card. Yeah, Marvin Vettori got the easy unanimous decision victory over Mutante with all judges scoring the fight 30-27 in favour of Vettori. A pretty boring fight, not a lot that was noteworthy about either fighters' performances. Vettori was definitely the more dominant and engaged fighter, while Ferreira didn't really do much. Yeah, I'm taking back my words about Vettori. I liked his post-fight interview too. Maybe he is the real deal in the middleweight division, who knows? Karl Roberson def. Wellington Turman - Split Decision Another quite boring fight that went to the judges, but this time, one of the judges actually scored the fight in favour of the loser. The fight ended 28-29, 29-28, 29-28, meaning Turman actually won the fight according to one of the judges, but alas, Roberson won the split decision. Personally, I scored the fight 29-28 Roberson, it was close to call but I think Roberson's offense was more effective. I didn't think Turman did badly either, his gameplan was mostly lying on his back and trying to get submissions in from the ground. Didn't really care for this, I don't know how this made it onto the main card. But hey, I got the winner correct. Josh Emmett def. Mirsad Bektić - TKO via Punches (4:25 R1) This was another fight I was looking forward to see on this card. Both Emmett and Bektić are very talented featherweight fighters and putting them in the octagon together could only end up resulting in an interesting fight, but I didn't expect such a quick finish. I predicted the fight to go all 3 rounds but it actually ended in the first, when Josh Emmett hit Bektić clean in the face with a jab and finished Bektić on the ground with mean punches. A great performance from Emmett and an unfortunate loss for Bektić. Another prediction right! Urijah Faber def. Ricky Simon - TKO via Punches (0:46 R1) Wow I was far off in this prediction. I predicted Simon to get the easy TKO win in the first round but as it turns out, I picked the wrong fighter to do so. The hometown fighter Urijah Faber came back to the octagon in quick fashion by finishing his opponent Ricky Simon in merely 46 seconds (Faber had a great walkout too). Faber dropped Simon with a swinging right overhand (which he learned from our Chinese boy Song Yadong) and continued with hammerfists until the referee stopped the fight. At first I thought the stoppage was early but now that I have a second thought, Simon was in no position to recover and Faber's offense was simply too powerful, so the stoppage was fair. Faber called out current UFC Flyweight and Bantamweight Champion Henry Cejudo after the fight and I wouldn't mind seeing that fight for the UFC Bantamweight Championship. Germaine de Randamie def. Aspen Ladd - TKO via Punch (0:16 R1) Aaaaaand another prediction I got ABSOLUTELY wrong. Instead of a R2 Aspen Ladd TKO, Germaine de Randamie goes in and TKOs Aspen Ladd with a punch in 16 seconds. I was just left in awe when I saw this finish, as I was so hyped and was really looking forward to see what Aspen Ladd had to offer. Now, the stoppage, was it early or was it completely fair? Personally, when I first saw the stoppage, I thought it was incredibly early, I mean, at first sight, a stoppage after 1 punch HAS to be early right? But I thought more about it afterwards and I'm starting to doubt my thoughts more. I first thought about Aspen Ladd's horrendous weight cut. At the weight-ins she looked horrible, completely dehydrated and constantly shaking, while de Randamie looked perfectly fine and confident. In the future, she needs to fix her weight cutting process, because that was scary and it might have had an effect on her ability to take a punch. Secondly, I thought about simply how dangerous de Randamie's striking is. Even if the fight was stopped early, de Randamie would have pounced on Ladd and made the damage even worse, so it was safer to stop the fight, taking into account Ladd's weight cut. So yeah, I'm just a bit ambivalent on the matter. Anyways, that's a massive win for the Iron Lady, who might be in title contention zone now. I'm sure Aspen Ladd can recover, she's still got it. Prediction Count: 2/5
  3. I'm liking my new gimmick with the United Nations. I'm having fun doing it and it gives me a lot of material to work with.
  4. NAME: Chris Black GENDER: Male LOOKS: Most average white man imaginable CHARACTERISTICS: Liar, deceiving, knows how to get under your skin, always late
  5. Joh

    A BPZ Story

    Name: Reginald Barker Age ( 5-95 ) : 56 Occupation: Newspaper Columnist Race: White Short Backstory: Reginald is a lonely old man who got ditched by his friends and family at an early age and has had to survive on low money all his life. He's pro-Trump and writes articles about politics to keep him stable.
  6. Brenden, Arius, Bart, Bailey, Nate
  7. I've always preferred Mario over Sonic, was exposed to him more as a kid and played more Mario games.
  8. Poor Bashka is having a hard time falling asleep
  9. I got #1 in Agar.io once. It was a bit mad.
  10. Joh

    MMAnalysis w/ Joh

    UFC Fight Night 155 Date: July 13th 2019 Venue: Golden 1 Center City: Sacramento, California Hello and welcome to MMAnalysis with Joh. Tonight, we’re taking a look at the first show after UFC 239, this being UFC Fight Night 155/UFC on ESPN+ 13/UFC Fight Night: de Randamie vs Ladd/whatever else I’m supposed to call it. On the main card we see the main event, a women’s bantamweight bout between Germaine de Randamie and Aspen Ladd, and the co-main, a men’s bantamweight bout between the returning Urijah Faber and Ricky Simon, plus other names scattered throughout the card. The preliminary fights don’t look that bad, there are some interesting bouts there, but as you know, we only cover the main card of shows on MMAnalysis, so alas, we must miss out on discussing the preliminaries (though I’m excited for Darren Elkins vs Ryan Hall). With all that out of the way, let’s get started, starting off with the first fight of the main card and moving all the way up to the main event. I’ll offer my thoughts and try to predict how the fights will end. Marvin Vettori vs Cezar Ferreira In our opening fight, we see a middleweight contest with Marvin Vettori taking on Cezar “Mutante” Ferreira. Marvin Vettori goes into this bout with a 12-4-1 record while Mutante holds a 13-7 record. This is Vettori’s first fight since April 2018, as he was suspended from the UFC for 6 months after testing positive for ostarine. His last fight was a bout against the current UFC Interim Middleweight Champion Israel Adesanya, in which he lost in a split decision, which is commendable but maybe the fact he got busted afterwards says something about it. Cezar Ferreira’s last fight was a unanimous decision loss to Ian Heinisch, but he has beaten some big names like Anthony Smith, Thiago Santos and Jack Hermansson. Obviously, both men are desperately in need of a win here, but I see this being quite a boring match-up, as both fighters are submission-orientated. I see this going all 3 rounds. Prediction: Decision Win - Cezar Ferreira ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Karl Roberson vs Wellington Turman Our next fight sees another middleweight bout, with Karl “Baby K” Roberson squaring off with UFC newcomer Wellington Turman. Roberson is going into this fight with an MMA record of 7-2 and the Brazilian has a record of 15-2. Baby K was signed through Dana White’s Tuesday Night Contender Series 3 and has won 2 out of his last 4 UFC fights. This is Turman’s UFC debut and he’s currently on a 4-fight win streak. I could see this fight going either way, Turman is a great submission specialist, with 7 submission wins to his name, while Roberson is an all-rounder. It’s hard to call, but after a recent loss, I think Roberson is back to prove himself again. Prediction: TKO Win (R3) - Karl Roberson ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Josh Emmett vs Mirsad Bektić In our third bout of the main card, we have a featherweight fight between Josh Emmett and Mirsad Bektić. Emmett currently holds a record of 14-2 and the Bosnian-American holds a record of 13-1. Emmett’s last fight was a win against Michael Johnson in March while Bektić is on a 2-fight win streak, though his last fight was in June 2018. This bout is also very difficult to predict because both are good fighters with almost perfect records, but for me, I feel like Bektić’s absence is going to cost him here, which is why I’ll give it to Emmett, but it will no doubt be a close contest. Maybe a split decision is in the books? Prediction: Decision Win - Josh Emmett ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Urijah Faber vs Ricky Simon In our co-main of the evening and our penultimate bout, we have UFC Hall of Famer Urijah “The California Kid” Faber making his UFC return to face Ricky Simon in the bantamweight division. Urijah Faber holds a 34-10 record while Ricky Simon holds a 15-1 record. This is Faber’s comeback fight, after announcing his retirement back in 2016, with his last fight being a unanimous decision win against Brad Pickett. Ricky Simon is currently on an 8-fight undefeated run, with him winning all 3 of his UFC fights. I’d love for Faber to win in his comeback in his hometown of Sacramento but I am not counting out Simon here, with him having 5 KO/TKO wins via punches, so he clearly has heavy hands. Plus with Faber being away for so long, I’m doubting his chances here. Prediction: TKO Win (R1) - Ricky Simon ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Germaine de Randamie vs Aspen Ladd And now it’s time to take a look at the main event of UFC Fight Night 155. In the main event we see a women’s bantamweight bout with Germaine “The Iron Lady” de Randamie taking on Aspen Ladd. de Randamie holds an MMA record of 8-3 while Aspen holds an 8-0 undefeated record. de Randamie has only fought twice in the past 3 years and both of those were unanimous decision wins, although the first one was a very controversial win over Holly Holm which people argued should’ve been a DQ win for Holm due to strikes after the bell from de Randamie. Aspen Ladd is still undefeated and has won her first 3 fights in the UFC with wins over Tonya Evinger and Sijara Eubanks, and this might be her hardest fight yet. Both are strikers but I feel like de Randamie will try and grinding out the fight over a long period of time, while Ladd will go straight for the TKO. Ladd is a dangerous TKO artist and with de Randamie only getting older, I think Ladd has this in the bag. With this, would she be next in line for Amanda Nunes' UFC Women's Bantamweight Championship? Prediction: TKO Win (R2) - Aspen Ladd ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for joining me in my analysis of UFC Fight Night 155. I'm Joh and see you at the fights.
  11. Joh

    MMAnalysis w/ Joh

    He's playing it safe, he knows he's good enough to control the fight so doesn't have to rely on finishing it early.
  12. We return from commercial break with a pre-taped vignette, which is located in the capital city of Ireland, Dublin. It’s a nice and bright day in the city. The camera shows a car pulling up the street, and out comes the members of the United Nations, Angelo, Monda and the Irish man himself, Joh. They all exit the car at the same time and place themselves on the sidewalk. Joh: Here we are gentlemen. We have arrived at the embodiment of Irish culture. We have arrived at a very popular tourist attraction here in Dublin. I hope you guys enjoy your time here, don’t get too hyped, I know it’s an intriguing location but you need to compose yourselves as we take this tour. Are you guys ready? Monda: Oh…………..yes…………….I sure am. The camera pans over as the destination is revealed to the people at home. The United Nations have arrived at the famous Guinness Storehouse, a major tourist attraction in the capital city, which showcases the history of beer and shows off different aspects of Guinness like brewing, ingredients and other things. Angelo: Joh, do you think this is a good idea? Y’know, with how Monda has been recently, would it not be safer to go somewhere else? Joh: Hmmm, maybe you’re right. Actually, you’re exactly right, which is why…. Suddenly, Joh whips a pair of handcuffs out from his pocket while grasping Monda’s wrist. Boom, Monda has been handcuffed to the car. Monda: OH COME ON WHAT??? LET ME OUT MAN Joh and Angelo walk off as if they haven’t heard anything. They are ushered in and taken on tour around the Storehouse. The Storehouse is a huge building, with 7 floors covering a numerous amount of topics. As Joh and Angelo are being shown the contents of the Storehouse, they chat and discuss their future and their upcoming matches. Joh: Angelo, it’s great that you and Monda could join me here in such a historic area such as the Guinness Storehouse. To you two, it may seem like a weird building dedicated to beer, but in reality it’s much more than that. It’s a brilliant representation of what a lot of Ireland is all about. We’re homegrown, we have a rich history, we are proud of who we are. As us Irish say, “An bhfuil cead agam dul go dtí an leithreas?”, which just means “Who can take our pride and history from us?” in Irish Gaelic. Angelo: Wow Joh, that’s so fascinating. Y’know, I’ve always admired the Irish for their national pride, they’re always so green and fun and drunk and all that. And I think it’s really good that you’re also being so proud of your nation and its history. That’s why I’m so proud to be Italian, we also have a great history and a great culture. It’s why you, me and the American are doing what we’re doing, we embrace our differences and combine to make a wonderful force of international power. With our passion and drive, we're going straight to a tag title shot in no time. Joh: Yes, I was meaning to talk about our match just now. It's a great starting off point for us in our dream of becoming champions. Picking off 3 teams at once only makes it easier for us. We may be a new team on the block, but never underestimate the knowledge of a few OGs. We have the teams of Meko & Alex Costa, SSW Club and Deadman's Hand all craving an opportunity at challenging for championship gold. I commend their efforts, but at the end of the day, you're never going to stop the unity of the United Nations. Meko & Alex Costa are two unproven scrubs. I obviously remember the times when I was a rookie, but my first few months were full of championship glory, while they are still trying to make a name for themselves on the big stage, what do they have between them, 1 NXT Championship? I feel pity, but I probably shouldn't in an environment like this. For Meko to come at us and say he will tear this union apart for the honour of Britain is just laughable to me, it's a class representation of the state of Britain in the political world, and importantly, Britain is the troubled one in that situation too. I feel like Alex Costa is happy to be there honestly. Angelo: So so true man, I have no idea why Meko decided to attack me, I was simply saying what he was afraid to hear.........the truth. Anyways, we must talk about the stooges themselves, SSW Club. I have to admit Joh, I have no idea what's going on with them at the moment. It seems like they're more focused on other things, like meeting with Bruce Willis and worrying about their buddies Alice and Gary. I believe they have no chance against the much superior teams in this bout. Joshua Scott and Bulldozer are the laughing stocks of this competition and honestly I think their inclusion in the match-up is sickening. Joh: Took the words right out of my mouth Angelo. The SSW Club are no match for our power. Joh and Angelo reach the seventh floor of the Storehouse, where they find themselves at Gravity Bar, where they both get some Guinness and take a look at Dublin from the view they have. Joh: But now, we should probably get to this nuisance Deadman’s Hand. Blade and Kieron Black. I’m guessing you’ve heard the words from Blade and how ridiculous they are. Blade thinks he can just get under our skin and make us feel undermined, but he should know that he’s messing with the wrong group of people here. He had the audacity to say I was the one who ruined the tag team division from its inception, but the reality is I would have proudly carried that championship if it weren’t for my partner being the weak link of the team, and who has seemed to vanish off the face of the earth now, plus we were so dominant in beating the Hall of Famers a.k.a Jake and Nebakos, that we held our position at the top of the food chain with no one even daring to come after us, so I believe that says a lot about my power more than my failure. We also shouldn’t forget that this is Blade we’re talking about here, the man who has lost the majority of his matches in BPZ yet still has such a strong belief that we’re just some old guys looking for a send-off or something like that. Angelo: Oh absolutely, it’s a hypocritical thing to say, coming from someone so nonthreatening as Blade. He may have beaten me twice but little does he know that I am coming back for vengeance, a vengeance even he couldn’t see coming with his tiny brain. I just find it hilarious how someone like him can talk on and on about other people’s losing efforts when losing efforts have been such a prevalent outcome throughout his entire career. It’s comical how he thinks a dig at my various personas will make his words hurt, but what do you expect from Blade, or Hollow, or Rey Espada? I regret some of my decision, I admit, but by the time of King of the Ring, everything will come full circle, and Deadman’s Hand will be dead men after all, at the hands of the United Nations. Joh: Speaking of retirements, isn’t Blade’s tag partner a former retiree who is only hanging on for dear life as Blade tries to carry him through this storm? Am I thinking right? Angelo: Maybe you’re right, name seems to slip me by right now, it might be the strength of the Guinness… The camera fades out as Angelo and Joh take another sip of their Guinness. It fades back in to show them near the exit of the Storehouse, thanking everyone for such an amazing experience. And then, as they’re leaving, they spot a seated Monda, sitting just outside the car, beer can in hand. Angelo: Wait, where’d he get tha- Monda: HEY GUYS, how was your little trip?? Oh yeah, I brought a little company along with me in my pocket, just been sitting out here. Angelo and Joh look at each other and sigh, before releasing Monda from his handcuffs and getting back into the car, driving into the distance.
  13. Randy Savage vs Vince McMahon Shawn Michaels vs CM Punk Hulk Hogan vs Bray Wyatt Samoa Joe vs Chris Jericho The Undertaker vs Batista Kurt Angle vs Ric Flair The Rock vs John Cena Steve Austin vs Dusty Rhodes
  14. I think the title of this topic should be pretty self-explanatory, which wrestlers do you enjoy that you either don't want to like or feel like they're not generally liked by a lot of other people?
  15. Honestly, I think it's really tough to beat Royal Rumble 1999 in this department. That match is horrifying and there's a reason that it's looked back on so infamously today.
  16. I guess I'd say the Celtics? I'm not much of a basketball guy but they've always caught my eye, and the name and badge certainly helped.
  17. Lol what, this team was crashing out of the World Cup in the quarter finals last year and is only winning the Copa America because they're easily the best team in that competition (not saying much) As for the question, I think Messi is still the best with Ronaldo being a very close 2nd.
  18. Joh

    UFC - The Promise Land

    Name (First And Last): Aaron Lehmann Height: 6'0" Weight: 185lbs (Middleweight) Personality (Cocky, Humble, Etc.): Reserved, will be a savage when tensions are high Walk Out Music: Another One Bites The Dust Fighting Style (Brawler, Submission, Ground Game Etc): All-Rounded, mostly wrestling and kickboxing Appearance (Tattoos, Hair Color, Etc.): Blonde, cross tattoo on left pec From: Detroit, Michigan, USA

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