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Pokemon Platinum - The Impossible Nuzlocke

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There it is. The game that the Pokemon community (along with myself) has labeled as being one of the most difficult challenges for a player. High level trainers, poor encounters, and overall a mental challenge with the speed of the game. Pokemon Platinum is the first game I've ever played, and since playing it for the first time, I've revisited the games many times. I've used different teams, tried different challenges, I've done it all. And now, I think it's the right time for me to start yet another Nuzlocke. But this time, I'd like to share my experience with you all. It'll be hell at least, but I'm gonna give it a shot. Here's what I've been up to so far:

Part 1

Alright, the nice Professor Rowan told me some general stuff as if I haven't played the game multiple times already, and then asked for my name and my rival's name. Being the comedic genius I am, I decided to go with a few classics.


Hopefully that will play out, hopefully for at least one gag. If not, then it's all in vain. But alas, Rowan says a bit more about Pokemon, and then he magically shrinks me down so I can fit in the town. And while I'm in my room minding my own business and watching some po- TV, Mama sprints up the stairs. I don't know why my mom let him in, but he tells me to meet him outside of the town. My mom warns about the tall grass, and I tell her to piss off and leave the house. Although Mama told me to go to the route, I know to go straight to his house. And sure enough, he sprints right out, colliding with me. Then he sprints off to the route, but wait! The dumbass forgot something again. So I have to haul my small ass into his house and go into his room. And then with a bit of explanation, he runs out again, saying he'll fine me like $10 million if he beats me there. And because he can teleport, he sure does. Poke2.JPG.14d720880430fb8fb706a59c3f2b29d9.JPG

This guy. Little does he know I'm gonna flawless him for the whole journey. But he wants to go into the grass, but right before he yeets himself in, Rowan yells from like a mile away and he stops. He hobbles his old ass over and explains that we shouldn't be doing this shit and he's too old. Then Mama pulls a sneaky one and says he's "mature" enough to let me get a Pokemon instead of him, and that changes the professor's heart. He says because Mama's so "mature", he'll give us each a Pokemon. Then his assistant, Dawn, struts on over with the mons in the briefcase and we're ready to get down to business. Mama says I can have the first pick because he's so "mature", but basically he wants the type advantage.

And bang, that's how far I got. If you've read up until this point, thank you for reading and please leave votes for who'd you like to see as a starter. And for Nuzlockes, you need to give Pokemon nicknames, and I'm unbelievable bad at doing that, or at least for starters. So, if you could fill out the form below, that'd be great.

Starter (Turtwig, Chimchar, Piplup):

Why You Chose Then (Trying to help you guys out and make it less of a dribble post):


I'll pick whichever starter gets the most votes and choose the nickname that appeals the most to me. I'll make longer episodes in the future, but for now this is a start. And also, I'll be uploading the gameplay to YouTube. No volume, just pure gameplay in case you're wondering about anything. I'd also like to thank @Alex Costa for his Pokemon diary which spawned this idea and @FDS for his Pokemon series on YouTube which made me go through with it.

Again, thank you all for reading, stay tuned for more.




Edited by Mikey

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Starter: Chimchar

I’ve never been a big Chimchar guy, but Sinnoh is notorious for its lack of fire types. Speed and good damage are always useful in a nuzlocke, and that’s where Infernape shines. If you get it to Monferno, it can make quick work of Roark with Mach Punch. 

Nickname: Mojojojo.

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Starter (Turtwig, Chimchar, Piplup): Chimchar

Why You Chose Then (Trying to help you guys out and make it less of a dribble post): In the Sinnoh Region I believe you are only given the choice of like 3 fire type Pokemon. The Chimchar line, The Ponyta Line and Flareon. Therefore it makes sense for you to choose Chimchar for this nuzlocke,you'll more than likely get coverage elsewhere later on.

Nickname: Fuego

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Starter (Turtwig, Chimchar, Piplup): Piplup 

Why You Chose Then (Trying to help you guys out and make it less of a dribble post): Easy start to the game, if you're worried about the weakness to gardenia high chance you encounter a starly as your first encounter, probably has the most balanced set out of the 3 and special attackers early on usually edge out physical attackers at least in my experience 

Nickname: Superion 

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Part 2

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages, we are back with some more Pokemon Platinum! Last time I left off, about to choose my starter. And after some input from you guys (thank you to all who voted and apologies FDS), I decided to go with the fire type Pokemon, Chimchar. All three guys made this run about 20x easier now, because we have a fire type!


Awww, isn't he cute? Mama doesn't agree, so he chooses Piplup, a counter to Chimchar, at least for now. Dawn and Rowan take their leave to Sandgem Town and Mama challenges me to a battle. Alright so, time to begin the sweeps of his time. Alright we'll just- wait a second.


I CAN EXPLAIN! I really didn't think him growling me to my lowest point would work, but it did. Perhaps I was a bit unlucky to get no crits, but sometimes it happens like that. But luckily for me, the official rules of a Nuzlocke are it doesn't begin until you receive your first Pokeball to catch wild Pokemon in. Therefore, I'm still good to go. So yeah, I teleport home in defeat, my mom heals me, and then BLESSES ME WITH RUNNING SHOES! YES! Now that the game is thrice as fast, I go back to the place where I lost my first battle. Mama is chilling there like a fucking goon, not moving an inch since I lost. He says we should go to the lake and capture the legendary spirits to repay Rowan, but when we arrive, we find the team Galatic boss, Cyrus, looking out at the lake and talking to himself.


He does this literally every time you see him in the game, and it's really quite annoying. But yeah, Mama realizes we have no Pokeballs, so he then says "fuck it" and runs to Sandgem Town, racing me again. With his teleportation powers, I once again lose, but I gain some valuables things along the way. First off, we get some good experience while scratching/burning some innocent birds and beavers, along with some annoying bugs. Second, we get a potion from the nice lady in the grass near the town, bless her.


And last but not least, I remembered the emulator thing I'm running the game on has a speedup option! So now everything's going four times as fast, and it's sooo good. But alas, we make it to Sandgem Town, and Dawn's waiting for us. She takes us into the lab, and after Rowan reads off a fucking essay about Pokemon, I get to choose the nickname of the Chimchar. And it is, drumroll please...


Wukong! I've gone with Alex's name as I really like the character Wukong and Infernape is gonna be a pretty cool representation of it. I liked Fuego and Mojojojo, but I think Wukong is a name that is worthy of the leader of the party. So after that's done, Rowan and Dawn pelt me with a few more facts and we're finally free!


Just kidding, Rowan yells at me while standing right in my eye like the weird old man he is. But his intentions are good, and he rewards me with TM 27 (my favorite number), Return. I won't be using it on Wukong (or at least just yet) because TM's in Platinum are single use. I'm hoping to get a Pokemon like Buneary or Cleffa who are normal types and evolve from happiness so the move will be effective on them. Rowan finally leaves Dawn and I alone for some, haha, quality guiding! She shows me the center and the mart like I've never heard of Pokemon before, and then she fucks off to the route above to wait for me. Meanwhile, I bypass the system and enter the mart and purchase some Pokeballs. And with that, the Nuzlocke has officially begun. Here are the rules (I'll post at the beginning of every episode):

Nuzlocke Rules

1. Any fainted Pokemon is considered dead (cannot be used again)

2. Can only catch the first Pokemon the appears on a route (with species and shiny clause)

3. Must nickname all caught Pokemon

4. No legendaries/traded Pokemon (can only catch)

5. If all Pokemon in the party faint, they are considered dead, but others in the PC can still be used to continue the playthrough

6. These rules are not enforced until the first Pokeball is obtained

And there it is. I'll maybe add a few more to this such as limiting the amount of items I can use in battle or setting the battle mode to set, but I think this is fair for now. I'm not the best player of Pokemon, and these little conveniences help me out a lot. But yeah, I got my Pokeballs! So I go back to the previous route and get my first encounter, and I'm pleased to say it's a level 3 male Starly! Starly is a great Pokemon to start with as it learns the move Wing Attack at level 9, a 60 power physical move that is essentially 90 power because of STAB (Same Type Attack Boost/Bonus). In evolves at the low level of 14 into Staravia and does a good job at taking out the second gym. I ultimately decided to name it...


Star Squared! I know that's not what it really says, but I'm gonna call him that. Afterward, I go back to the lake and rustle around in the grass near the lakeside a bit, and I find the other Pokemon I was looking for: Bidoof. I caught the level 4 female easily, and debated over it's name for a long, long time. I wanted a Bidoof because it learns the HM's Rock Smash and Cut, which is very, very good for the early game. These two moves are really bad, and I don't want them on anyone who's going to be a mainstay. HM's are moves that you need to remove obstacles in game, like bushes you cut with the move Cut. You cannot replace them, and they are usually poor moves (at least the first couple). So of course, I named my Bidoof...


Uh yeah. I don't even know if this is allowed, but that's exactly what Bidoof will be: my HM slave and nothing more. Perhaps it would've been more tasteful to add HM before, but nahhh. And that's really all I did. I grinded my team a little and got Wukong up to level 8 and Star Squared up to 6.

That's all for now, thank you all for reading! I'll have the next episode up as soon as possible. Thanks to everyone who submitted a reply to the first episode with a starter, I hope you all are looking forward to more!


Video won't process on YouTube, so I just have the written part for now


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Part 3


Nuzlocke Rules

1. Any fainted Pokemon is considered dead (cannot be used again)

2. Can only catch the first Pokemon the appears on a route (with species and shiny clause)

3. Must nickname all caught Pokemon

4. No legendaries/traded Pokemon (can only catch)

5. If all Pokemon in the party faint, they are considered dead, but others in the PC can still be used to continue the playthrough

6. These rules are not enforced until the first Pokeball is obtained

And, we're back! So I last left off just outside of Dawn's cutscene on Route 202, and now I've engaged. She does some basic stuff, catching a Bidoof with her Turtwig, so nothing special at all. She gives me a solid 5 Pokeballs, and with those, we are ready for this route's encounter. I have one Pokemon in mind and one only, and thankfully I get it after about 5-10 dupes. And the Pokemon is none other than Shinx! Shinx isn't anything special by itself, not learning an electric move until it's teens, but it's evolutions are insane. Luxio and Luxray are both speedy sweeper, having a pretty good distribution of physical and special attack. All in all, definitely a Pokemon I'm gonna want on my team until the late game. After successfully capturing the Shinx, I decided to name it:


Current, yayyy! Get it, because electrical current? Yeah, I really had no idea what to name this guy, but I plan on Wukong, Star Squared, and Current to become the OG's of the team, the ones that are the glue that holds our soon to be wild party together. I end up training up my team a little bit more, boasting around levels 6-9 for the whole team. Not bad, but still needs a bit of work. Nevertheless, I sweep through the route, landing myself in Jubilife City. This place is one I hate dearly. First off, it's not bad at all. Dawn comes up to us and we walk forward, and we meet the GOAT of all Pokemon characters: Looker.


The cheeky bastard, hiding behind the light pole like a true master of disguise. He lets Dawn and I know his name, says he's apart of the International Police Force or something like that, hands us a VS Recorder (complete shit), and sprints away. Dawn says Mama is in the trainer school, so that's my next stop. I pop inside, and talk to Mama, handing him the parcel. It has two town maps, and he blesses me with one of them as if this game is difficult to navigate (spoiler - it's not). He then dips off to the next route, and I take on the two trainers in the school. First I take on the girl, arguably the weaker one. She has a level 6 Bidoof, but this thing's nothing to fuck around with. I led with Star Squared, who was level 7. Obviously, I was cooking, but she whipped out a potion. I kid you not, I have the biggest balls in the world for leaving Star Squared in the whole fight. A critical tackle could've finisher him, but I had faith there would be no crit. And sure enough, there wasn't.


Tackle was hitting for 4, and crits do double the damage so you can imagine how I was feeling with 8 health left the turn before. Next up, there's the boy, but I knew what was coming. He has a level 6 Starly, but the catch is he gives this thing an X Attack. Wukong is able to KO it in two hits, but not before he got a quick attack in for 6 damage. It may not seem like a lot, but if say Current were in the battle, it wouldn't have been pretty. He gives us a potion for beating him, and we get to proceed. Next part...the dumbest thing about the game. We have to find 3 clowns to get this Pokegear thing. It's a dumb task, but I fuck with the Pokegear (called the Poketch) so hard. Like just look at this.


There are more options, but I like the walk counter one. I then go left to the town and talk to a fisherman in the little box thing in between, and he blesses me with an old rod. I then proceed north, visiting Route 204 where I can get a new encounter. Unfortunately, I was playing at night, so I found a Zubat. I was really hoping for a Budew, but a Zubat's still not terrible. 


I really had no motivation to give this thing a great name, but I can always rename later. Golbat and Crobat can be lethal especially if you get the latter at an early level. Very good for early game, and even decent for late game too. The only issue is getting there, and I'm not a very patient man. But my hopes were still high. I went even farther north and entered the Ravaged Path. Here is where I was planning on getting a Zubat, but luckily for me Psyduck appear too. After a few Zubat encounters, I find a Psyduck. I lead with Wukong cause he's a fire type, and try to ember to get a burn. Now Psyduck itself is pretty weak, but a water type this early is clutch for the rock gym. And honestly, Golduck is a decen-


Oh no...Psyduck fell to a critical ember, which is understandable given Wukong's level and special attack, but I'm not too torn. I then heal up and head straight east of Jubilife, heading onto Route 203 where Mama is waiting for me. He challenges me to a battle, and he has a level 7 Starly and a level 9 Piplup. This battle screwed me the first time I played the game as I was completely underprepared. It's an easy fight in theory, but if you don't have the right levels, it can be tough. Thankfully, we're overleveled for this one. My level 11 Wukong started against the Starly, and to my surprise, we got a 2 shot with Starly only using growl. Next up was Piplup, so I switched to my equal leveled Star Squared. I was expecting a bit of a fight, maybe having to swap, but Mama shocked me, having Piplup use growl like 3 times in a row. 4 wing attacks later, and Mama was toast. A whole battle where the only move used by the opposition was growl.


They never learn, do they? Oh well, that's where I ended my gameplay for this episode.

Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoyed! I decided to scrap the videos as they just don't wanna upload to YouTube and they're too big to upload to the forums. Next episode coming soon!

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